"You're like 9 to 5, I'm the weekend."
This is the line that shook my nerves, sent my heart to the pit of my stomach and caused me to, once again, experience emotions I am constantly trying to wash away.
Why you ask? Because.. I've been the 9 to 5, not knowing there was "The Weekend" to even worry about. Choosing people who choose you is one of the hardest, gut-wrenching and eye-opening things we can experience. It's raw. It's rough. And rarely done without losing someone who once meant something to you.
Never forget that you're an option to select when choosing.
Often times, we can get lost in seeing all of someone else and none of ourselves. Before we know it, there's a world consumed and surrounded by them and you don't even exist in it.
Whether it's a relationship, friendship, obligations or simple commitments, it is best to remember that you are one person, deserving of love, support, care and respect on a 50/50 level.
Nothing more, nothing less.
As scary as it seems, reevaluating the individuals in your life is a must. Everyone isn't for you and that is okay. Realizing this is the hard part. But, once the light-bulb flicks on, there's no turning it off.
You begin to realize your worth, see people for who they are rather than what you want them to be and prioritize those that truly matter and contribute to your well-being.
Yes, you'll lose essential connections.
Yes, you'll have to find comfort in distance.
But, yes you will be choosing you and that's what matters.
Relationships, friendships and commitments should not be draining, poisonous or questionably unwavering. If you find yourself in a one-sided connection, stop choosing someone who isn't choosing you. Remember that it is okay to put yourself first and the right people will gravitate towards you in time.
If you have to force it, it isn't real and if the feelings are mutual, the effort will be equal.
At the end of the day, you always have a choice and never let anyone or anything have you think differently. Choosing you is essential to establishing a solid foundation for the state of your mental health, so don't fight It when the opportunity presents itself.
As Alex Elle simply puts it:
Read books that fill you.
Listen to music that moves you.
Keep company that uplifts you.
Engage in positive self-talk.
Be your best self.